BEYOND THE BIG SKY

Oh boy, where do I even start.

Nads and Aye know damn well I’m the type to make a random edit for their birthdays, so they might find it weird (or too cheesy, which really isn’t our branding) that I’m actually writing an entire blog just for their birthdays this year. Basically, I’m setting myself up for some weird obligation since I also have to make one for Ayrelle in October (oh ayan, informed ka na sa public roast mo).

Anyways, I really find it crazy how we have been friends for 5 years, turning 6 now. For the most part of my life, I’m constantly moving here and there, so I never really had a true solid group of friends that I could call my constants growing up. I found all of my closest friends nearing my twenties, and Nads was actually one of the later ones since I met her at Ateneo. Needless to say, she is one of the most important people in my life.

Nads, it’s crazy how we actually started being this close, because I vividly recall you being just another one of the people I know with the surname Uy, which is funny because Ateneo has like a bazillion of them. The ludicrous abundance of Uys in Ateneo really made me not give much care for Nads at first, as she was just another schoolmate who would every now and then find a way to surprise me (for many reasons).

About Nads… hmmm, Nads is incredibly smart. And I think I never really got to tell her in person, but I really do admire that part about her. But I also think that her brilliance, no cap, stems from her being a hard worker too.  I’m not even trying to be mushy here – I met so many people in Ateneo who were just smart effortlessly, and would sometimes flaunt how they didn’t need to put in the work to get the grades they were achieving. Well, Nads wasn’t like those people. She didn’t say much at all, if anything. She was the type of student who would observe, nod, say OK, and get shit done. Initially, my general impression for Nads was pretty simple: she was an Uy, smart, humble and she really wasn’t that much interested in people, which I found highly intriguing.

One could say that Nads and I was polar opposites back in college, when I think about it in retrospect. She was a Makati girl who has probably never had preservatives, while I was a boy from Novaliches who commuted to campus daily. I was the social butterfly who would go to every party he was invited to while Nads was the dedicated athlete who couldn’t even physically bring herself to cuss out loud. We were basically on both ends of the spectrum. I never really thought we could be this close given our backgrounds but it really all changed when I found out she had Corgis we had this mandatary group guidance counselor requirement for our curriculum or something. 

See, I thought Nads was an only child given the stuff I knew about her before that session. Boy, was I rocked to my core. Like, I could still picture Nads’ slightly offended face when I gasped “You have siblings?! You’re not an only child?!” Yeah I do overreact every now and then, but I was genuinely very caught back when I found out. Nads always was a pleasant surprise for me. She’s unpredictable in the best way possible. My block back then knew that I could be very annoying, and a distinct example of that was when the word I chose to describe Nads, which was “flaky” of all words, left everyone in our block somehow puzzled. I think that was a huge mistake on my part.

Back then, Nads was such a sweet summer child. One second she would be one of the smartest people in the room, and at the very next second surprise us by letting us know that she was unaware of some of the most common things known to the people our age. Then you’ll find out she’s also an athlete with a tally of accolades under her belt for different kinds of sports. And then you’ll also find out she’s not an only child (no offense, Ryan) – you just never really know what to expect from Nads when you first get to meet and know her, I think she’s a wild card even, but sometimes it really bothers me in the middle of some random night that of all words I could’ve chosen back then, it certainly shouldn’t have been flaky. She is unique, and I think there really is no better word to describe her.

Our friendship dynamic significantly shifted for the better when I shifted out of our course. Most people who shift out tend to be phased out of the group, but I distinctly remember exerting extra effort to keep on reaching out to our block (heck, we were only 9 in the block, and I think I really ended up liking my blockmates). As if it was a cosmic gag of sorts, Nads was the one who popularized calling me the leaver, which is kinda gaggy because I decided it would be best if I shifted out just weeks after our first official hangout as a block at Popup Katipunan lol. Over the course of the incoming sophomore year’s first semester, I would join some of my old block’s classes and I guess this was the time I weirdly started to bond more with Nads.

The first time I actually got to celebrate Nads’ birthday is one of, if not, the most important event of my college experience. Nads invited the block to a dinner at Shangrila Makati, which I had the honor of being the designated photographer of. It was a cool night where we got to hang out as a block and have good food. But what stood out for me was the smaller, more intricately planned personal celebration for Nads a week after. Due to schedule conflicts, not everyone from the block was able to go, but I clearly remember stressing over with Ayrelle the logistics of this small and rather weird gathering, like, who’s getting a cake and what not. Nads and the others were coming off of a morning Saturday class so it was up to me to set up for the surprise lunch because ehem *leaver* so we had different class schedules since I wasn’t with the block anymore. I think Nads assumed that it was only a normal lunch after class, which was probably the reason why the first thing she said when she got to Old Lan Kwai was “Why is Patrick here?” It was such a fun and memorable day for me because I am notoriously known for being physically incapable of smiling for photos (I just look horrible when I do), but for that specific day, I was able to take an actual decent one. *plook*

Our friendship only blossomed further from that point. Which is crazy because a month after said surprise lunch birthday party, just when you think the universe is not the biggest killjoy, COVID robbed us of our chance to get to actually physically hangout now that we’ve fully started to bond. I won’t go much into detail since I could sum up what happened quite easily: went home to Japan during the pandemic and I burnt a lot of bridges by going AWOL for basically two years, gained a hella lot of weight, and disassociated from society. During this part, I never even talked to Aye and Nads, despite them sending me messages to no end just to check on me — probs one of the worst things I have ever done to other people, and definitely one of my biggest regrets in life. 

I eventually messaged them back when I found out about the complications with Aye’s health, and since then, I remember making a conscious decision that I would never forgive myself if I ever ignored them like that again. The chokehold that day has on me will never be forgotten lmao literally snot and tears everywhere. Post-COVID, Aye and Nads got me through the weariness of it all, through a really bad breakup (my fault), and even recruitment (they were the first to know I landed on a job that required me to come back home to the Philippines).

It hasn’t been all bliss though, because I’m such a piece of shit that’s always going through something with his life. Also, Nads and Aye graduated Ateneo with absolutely fucking amazing colors – meaning they had to also start dun dun dunnn… adulting. It wasn’t like those early days where we’ll just message each other and meet up at Arete to hang out. Life isn’t easy at all, and I for one had a really hard time during my quarter life crisis era (24-26 was GARBAGE). Even though I was back in the Philippines, the three of us barely had time to hang out because of conflicting schedules. It’s been a running gag between the three of us that we never get to meet during December, besides that one time at HGY where we had the block Christmas party years ago. We broke that curse last year by watching Wicked together. We’ve been working on the issue (mostly me, because I’m the one who is hardest to reach).

I had the shittiest year last year but I think I got a hang of this weird life I have chosen to take. And I’m always gonna be thankful to Nads and Aye for being so fucking patient with me. It’s just crazy to think about how they were able to tolerate me when I’m this problematic: all I did during college was randomly hookup and drink out, and quite recently, struggle with my mental health issues. They literally saw almost every weird and twisted facet of my adulting life in the past half decade and said “ughm… oh, okay” and shrugged it off. Absolute bad bitches ngl. Right now, as a token of my gratitude, I do everything in my power to find time to hang out with them. It’s a nice touch that I currently live in Makati, so Nads and I are basically neighbors and Chandler can get to play with Almond and Nugget as long as Nads is okay with it hihi. Ayrelle though… I, personally, love Mayor Joy and Quezon City. I have no further statements, your honor.

Enough about me, since this post is about Nads. Nads, thank you for always being there for me and having my back. I want to be friends with you forever because you’re rich and Ryan is a lawyer because let’s face it I’m always this close to committing crime you’re an amazing person who would bring absolute joy to anyone’s life just by being your most unapologetic self. Frankly, the universe needs more people like you, and I really believe you being born on a random day this February is God’s gift to the universe. I truly believe that you deserve all your success in life, and I wish for nothing but two things: that you get everything you ever wish for, and that I get to be there to witness you celebrate it. 

Literally 5 years apart, but I’m glad and grateful to be invited to celebrate your special day with your family again (also because Nads family has the absolute best taste in choosing food like frfr I will be making a visit soon to La Spezia BGC ugh that Ravioli and the clams were nothing short of EXQUISITE). Being able to help document your life brings me no greater bliss. Happy Birthday, Nads! We have so much planned for us this year, ghorl!!! Always got your back no matter what (also Chandler), screaming your name while fist pumping, WOOH! GO! GO! EDUCATOR GO! XOXO

Happy Birthday, Nads! Love ya to bits!